We know a few things about couples who have great sex lives. You may remember from a prior blog that couples who have good sex lives have good friendships – the two are linked! We know this from the research that has been done with couples. Take this quick quiz to see if your relationship has these ingredients for a great sex life.
Put a check mark by each item that you can say “yes” to:
- Say “I love you” every day and meant it.
- Give each other compliments.
- Kiss one another passionately for no reason.
- Physically affectionate, even in public.
- Keep playing and having fun together.
- Make sex a priority, not the last item of a long to-do list.
- Take romantic vacations.
The more check marks you have, the more likely your sex life is healthy. If you don’t have a lot of check marks, this may be a clue that your sex life could be improved (you may already suspect this).
What do you do if you want to see improvements? Look for ways to improve your friendship. For example, practice having intimate conversations and deeply listening to one another. Or making sure that you have meaningful time that you spend with each other on a consistent basis (even in small moments) every day, every week, and throughout the year.
Don’t wait to make improvements! And if you need some help, don’t be afraid to take action. Download the free Gottman Card Decks app and give it a try for great tips on conversations to have and how to have them. You can look into taking a couple’s workshop, such as The Art & Science of Love, or consider couples counseling. Great friendships and great romance and passion take a bit of work. Your relationship is worth it!